Monday, 20 April 2009

The heroe of legend


friend of marco to marco.
+what?
-do you remember me when I was 15?
+yes.
- December, 2005...
+ ...
- You know I was with this girl... she was a fuckin bitch... anyway I just wanted to tell you something.
+ ...
- Once she just told me... hey you know I have to pay this shit, and if i don't pay it, Im gonna fuck with the guy I have the debt with...
+ fuck...
- At the moment, let me tell you the true, i though i felt something for that person but of course i feel completely different now. Anyway something changed. I felt betrayed, I felt hate, I feelt true sadness. I felt destroyed. I felt alone and these things were for the first time.
+ohhh...
- I got the target. I got many things but just now I can realize many mistakes I've done in that shit I was involve with... You know I got in love with lonelyness.
+ Are you just realizing it now?
- Yes. Since that moment I can't live without it. I just need it to live, to be happy, to be unhappy, to live....
+ So you just can't stop it...?
- I'm a fuckin addict now. I'm sorry I just needed to tell it. I needed to find the reason of many things.
+ Man, you need a drink.
- I was born for alcohol. You know what is the worst thing about it? I'm looking for having this shit. I'm looking for it? So, wtf ? what do i am ? am I a fuckin musician or what?
+ You just know it...
- And you don't know it right ? perhaps I'm too good for this world, perhaps we really know our destiny.
+ perhaps you are expecting too much about it. At the end, let me tell you, when you wish they are just behind you they never are, when you want them to call you, they will never do it, when you want them to give you a little moment, they will not give you... Perhaps Yes, we already know our destiny.
- Yes.
+ Painful.


Msn Conversation.

Thursday, 16 April 2009

One of those days that you already know the end



(written monday 13th, april)

Treasures
Take one minute of your life and count how many you have. They can be things that you put in your neck, hands or feet. They can be necklaces that saw you almost loosing your life very far away from home. They can be remembers, feelings, pains (sometimes literally). I’m sure we all have these things that we try to protect, that we want to conserve.
Probably there is only one and, at the same time, many reasons why I’m working in the daylight without any kind of illegal or legal substances. To have an adventure is like you don’t know even if you are in the correct train when travelling, or like the time when I had to sleep back-to-back, in a bus returning home from another city with someone I used to enjoy to talk with.
It’s definitely a treasure when you want to cry and be upset and smile and the strongest feelings you can have when you are remembering or interacting with them. Whenever I put my necklace for example. They are places as well. They are scares or abrasions that never got closed (heridas ke nunca cerraron).
Some passages are to be crossed alone. You could get hurt while trying, but as my father showed me, the honour is the most important thing. Even if you get killed in the passage, you will never loose the honour. It’s kind of funny but it will be up to you, even if you want your dream to decide it for you. You will get a kiss, one last look, one last night, but anyway you have to face it and be a man.
I was wrong in the last post when I said happiness or sadness can be reached with 2 words. I have just realized that it can be reached with one, if you know how to pronounce it. It’s the quality; it’s like a Peruvian movie. Yes, the Peruvian movies where you can see very old stairs and you hear the sound of them. And while you are going up the stairs, or the mountain in some uncommon cases, you are sure that what is waiting for you after it will not be good or bad but different, strange, bizarre, perhaps so human that you might have the possibility not to live after it or get addicted if we continue with the Peruvian stairs analogy.
I think it was going great. Unfortunately I’m will have to stop it.

For all the respect you deserve Cymrus. You will probably have your conclusion after.

Sunday, 5 April 2009

This is the "new" plan

What is real? What is a dream? Why I'm in another world? Where do I want to go?
"Take on me, Aha."

It's being so fucking different. It's being difficult actually, but as I said in the last post, I know that the condemnation is to wake up everyday. So, to sum up, even if I get drunk, high or have sex, yes, tomorrow I must wake up. What am I learning about this? I will definitely say that I'm learning that I don't know what on the hell I'm doing.

What are you doing? Let's start by saying that good or bad things can vary so much that for some girls, anal sex is good, for others it's not good. Happiness or sadness? That's a key question that I don't know which I like, or which I want to have for myself. These extreme feelings can change with just 2 words. They can also be part of the other one. So yes, I don't know what I'm doing, but I can say that I'm accepting this fact.

Competition can be part of this. Some people already know what they want, how they want and what to do to get it. In my case, I just can say that I don't want to have it so clear. My goal then, is not to have pre-structured life. I'm, in my way, having an adventure. It's a huge adventure in which I see myself dreaming of having something I will never achieve. Yes, dreams or illusions or inventions.

The first dream I remember is the one I had when I was 6 or 7 years old. It was in Mexico, there was a woman with me and I was driving a red car. Then, I started to invent some stories while I was on bed before sleeping. They were also with girls and red cars. Then I decided to start living these dreams and at the same moment dreaming of them in my bed. Today I just want to close my eyes and sleep as soon as possible.
(this I think is one good example of the influence I had in that moment: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AQrcH45pAeU&feature=PlayList&p=85D0A5DBB0E00670&index=0&playnext=1)

The perfect way to describe a "lonely guy" or a esteparian wolf like me is with my dreams. In our cases, when you are like this, you will always feel it. It doesn't matter where you are, how many people you are with or if you are with that special person. You will always feel alone. It's part of us and maybe, that's the reason of having the most impossible or crazy dreams. A romantic and lonely guy who dreams a lot. My dreams now remind me that sometimes there are some things that must be accepted. Not just with words but with a feeling from the deepest part of your soul. Eyes are one way to look at your soul. How you look, how you touch, how you talk. This is where you can find out this acceptation. My dream(s) are indeed holding me of continuing my route. Actually in this part, I don't know what is my route as I told you, but I think I have to continue and changing different obstacles right?

Future is now with me. He is now seating next to me listening the very interesting story I'm telling. We have just done a deal. At this moment, he is not going to tell me anything about me or others, and for that he will give the opportunity of being sadness or happiness, he will give the condemnation of having to wake up, open the eyes without knowing what is going to happen.

To plan something? Yesterday I didn't plan, but I was expecting to go to a club like a couple of weeks ago when I, in that opportunity, did plan to go to a club, but I didn't go. Or like today, when I was planning to have a good dinner, but it's now almost 2 a.m. and I haven't had any dinner yet. That means like I said before, don't you ever plan something that is not completely in you power. That means don't plan anything at all. I want an ice cream now, but there are less than 0.01 chances of an ice cream car to pass in front of my house.

What is my plan? My plan then, includes football, Sporting Cristal which is my first love of my whole life and Arsenal, anthropology (that doesn't count because is not a plan anymore is more than that), not to do anymore plans (which is basically just "let it be", or one just I don't give a fuck) and of course my dreams. Why my dreams? Because even if I don't want to think of them, even if they are holding and stopping me, even if they have made me change, they are part of my life, and there are some basic things that I have decided since the moments of listening Mar De Copas for the first times. There are some things I will never be able to change.

Yes, the plan has now changed, the same as me. I have also changed and to conclude, I don't know if it's good or bad this change, all I know is that there are many people waiting for me. There are many people looking to meet me, there are many feelings to be felt, there are many songs to listen and many adventures to have.

As the song says: (ya voy, carti team) perhaps, for me, you are waiting foooor, don't you worry, little by little, little by little, I'll be arriving. And yes, I'm gonna take my time to arrive and meet you. You know me, I'm always late! :)

P.S. in next posts I will be using more in-life examples. I'm sure they will be stupid and funny and of course useful. Thanks for you all people, for the support and the good times, vibes and feelings you transmit me. I wish I can meet every person I have ever spent good times with again, with just 1 exception. All the best for the people I love !!

...just to tell you that everything has changed.

Tuesday, 24 March 2009

wake up, you've got to continue...

after all the shit you had that day, you have to close your eyes knowing that tomorrow you must open them. yes, you must, because there are no more options.

tomorrow is it gonna be sunny or rainy? tomorrow what are you gonna do when you wake up? which is gonna be the first song you are gonna listen to? who is gonna be the first person you are gonna talk with? and with the whole small experience i could have, trust me, this last one can be very surprising.

anyway, after the first joint, the first glass of juice, the first song or the first stupid thing you can do, you are gonna realize you are, at that moment, living and you dont know for sure where are you gonna sleep that night or who you are gonna meet or which kind of drug you are gonna take.

well thats kind of the feeling i have. its like the very near future knocking on my door and asking me if he can come in and smoke a joint with me. of course im not gonna just stay on my bed. i have to open him the door. i have to smoke with him. i have to share the same water with him. yes its part of me. yes it doesnt make me feel sure of myself. not on myself, i mean im now ready to know that im a taugh guy, im not gonna go back never again, im always gonna stand up buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut, this shit... is something its hard to deal with.

...

sometimes they are really strange. you can find them in every type. it can get so hard the class of cultures. it can be so traumatic. for who? for everybody im sure. even if you dont want, even if you dont try, its there!

Lets not get confused with perserverance for example. it can be good sometimes but in the others is just when your dad tells you: No! i wont give you money this time! and you feel like "ok im not gonna ask you again, calm down..."

its like that. you cant change it, what you can do is to open your eyes again and again and try to do the more new things you can. to get the more exeperience you can get that day, because tomorrow is gonna be a more difficult day im sure.

and this is a very important advice i can give you. when someone asks you a question like: do you want to fuck? do you want to have anal sex? do you want to go out with me tonight? please im sure every stupid that has asked a question like that is gonna thank you a lot!: BE HONEST !!!!!!!!!! just that, no i dont want to fuck, no, i dont want to go out with you tonight, no i dont want sex i really want to sleep, no, i wont meet your parents. have you got it ?? im sick of these: no, im gonna call you back if i can, no, im not sure what im gonna do this weekend, no im not sure im ready for a relation, i need more time alone, when they are just thinking noooo im just thinking of the guy that never has time for me, the one that is fucking 1000 girls when she doesnt notice it, or just the worst or the perfect one you can ever imagine. it has happened to you right?

or when they just tell you something because they think you expect them to tell you. hey im sorry you were right. hey you are a very good guy. hey you are so deep. Hey! im not asking you any favour. im not asking you for sweet words. im not asking you to tell me that im doing good things. that is for cristians but, honesty, is something that cristians cant be proud of, right? it must be the same on girls, but since my personal and friends experience, this is what i could get.

and of course modesty, is it really hard to shut the mouth up? i know it was so fast to learn how to speak, but since the very first years of our lives they told us: "shut up". you have to remember it even if you are the queen of the UK, even if you are french, even if you move to London.

the stupidness thing of this period was to get late to my very important exam. of course i was the last one. fo course i got also late for the other exams of the week.

Peru vs. Chile promises a lot. lets hope to see our country, even if we dont believe in, to see them in a world cup at least once in our lives. do we have hopes? its important to say and believe that there are few, but there are there! if you can apply them to peru then you can apply to the chances you have to have sex or marry the girl you have washed the dishes for and was angry whenever you get drunk. thats it, theres no impossibles not even for peru to get to world cup!

its crazy to think about how fast the time has passed. it's remembered when you realized the things you can have done and that could have changed you live. the first joint i had, the first beer, the first kiss, the first sex, the first "something special you can think of". yes future you can come in im ready to have some drinks with you. seat next to me, wishpear in my ear, write it in the computer or just tell it like a good story. im ready for you to give me some advices, some chanllenges some stupid ideas to go for, some time and life. i will ask just one thing before it, let me take some beers and green, i really need to be ready to do it. its not that im a coward, is not that i cant do it with them, its just i need time for ME to be ready for.

Monday, 9 March 2009

Yuyanapaq

Una vez mas, hoy fue una de esas veces en que mi Peru me decepciono.

La ineficacia junto con el egoismo y la conveniencia del gobierno fueron factores combinados que hicieron que sus lideres mostraran la actitud que tienen los actuales lideres nacionales del Peru frente al bienestar popular y el progreso de este.

Yuyanapaq significa en quechua, "para no olvidar". Este es el termino utilizado por la comision de la verdad y reconciliacion que como como todos sabemos estuvo compuesta por reconocidos personajes que mostraron calidad y sobretodo mucho animo en descubrir la verdad en el estudio del la guerra contra el terrorismo en la cual murieron casi 70 000 personas quienes en su mayoria eran campesinos.

Segun esta estadistica, podemos concluir que los verdaderos perjudicados en todo esto fueron los campesinos quienes se contraron en medio de un fuego cruzado entre los grupos revolucionarios de Sendero Luminoso y el MRTA y las F.F.A.A.

Podemos acertar que en 20 anios de guerra y lucha armada, los gobiernos de Belaunde, Alan Garcia y Fujimori fueron bastante ineficacez para responder inteligentemente al los revolucionarios. Belaunde no presto interes a las provincias y centralizo su preocupacion a Lima. Garcia, debido a su preocupacion por la inflacion, apropiacion ilicita de cantidades inmensas de dinero para todo el APRA y matar a centenares de presos en muchas prisiones del pais, actua de manera poco inteligente y prepotente, y Fujimori y Montesinos muy buenos para hacerse del poder, iniciar corrupcion y convertirse en dictadores. Ni Belaunde ni el Apra pusieron contra el terrorismo. Fujimori tampoco, pero se enorgullece de que fue en su gobierno.

El terrorismo sucumbe por dos motivos:
1.- El primero porque no se puede decir la fecha, es cuando los campesinos, debido a la malformacion ideologica de Sendero Luminoso y el constante uso de violencia y terror implantado, se arman convirtiendose en las "rondas campesinas" y luchan contra estos grupos.

2.- La captura en Lima de Abimael Guzman el 12 de Septiembre de 1992 gracias al grupo policial de la Dincote (Direcion nacional contra el terrorismo) llamado Gein quienes encabezados por el general. (r) Antonio Ketin Vidal capuraron tambien a importantes camaradas tanto de SL como del MRTA.

Por otro lado lo que hizo fujimori fue, mal uso de la fuerza al mandar a una guerra frontal al ejercito a las alturas del peru en donde todo aquer del otro lado era el enemigo. Asi como crear grupos especiales que liquidaban a "importantes" miembros y contactos en lugares estrategicos llamese cantuta o barrios altos. El gobierno de Fujimori, mas alla de algun dinero que pudo dar, no presto ni interes ni participo en ese proceso.

Hoy en dia, debido a la iniciativa del gobierno Aleman para apoyar con $2 millones para la construccion del Museo de la memoria, Antero Florez-Araos, ministro de defensa del gobierno de Alan Garcia, rechazo la iniciativa sennialando que hay prioridades mas importantes como la construccion de colegios y hospitales.

Que tan importante es recordar? Sera que el gobierno no quiere publicar el genocidio de presos politicos en carceles como el fronton? O sera un verdadero desinteren por recordar lo que paso, aducindo ademas que podria hacerse de aca a unos 30 o 40 anios.

Han pasado ya muchos anios desde los ultimos ataques importantes del terrorismo. Basicamente han pasado ya casi 30 anios desde que empezo y 17 desde que Abimael fue capturado. 70 000 peruanos no seran recordados hoy, sino dentro de 30 anios.

Luego de muchos pueblos destruidos, hombres, ninios y mujeres masacrados, danios cuantisos en materiales y autoridades ineficacez y despreocupadas, todo esto quedara sin recordar y sin explicarle la verdad. Porque al pueblo peruano se le debe una explicacion. Se le debe una verdad oficial. Se le debe dar la oportunidad de aprender y comprender los sucesos pasados.

Pero para el gobierno los colegios, hospitales y carreteras son mas importantes. La cultura no tiene precio. La verdad y lo que ocurrio en la historia peruana no tiene precio. Por que no se recortan otros presupuestos? Por que no se hace uso de la inversion privada? Por que se gastan millones en apoyo al ejercito si se sabe que Sendero Luminoso y MRTA fueron derrotados por su propia ideologia y el uso de tacticas de inteligencia? Por que las clases bajas siguen en el mismo estado olvidado por el gobierno? Por que hay gente que muere de hambre, o de frio y que no saben nisiquiera hablar espaniol. Pues nisiquiera hay un traductor oficial de quechua o aymara y las leyes solo estan hechas en espaniol.

Esa es la realidad nacional fuera de la inmensa burbuja llamada Lima que incluso tambien tiene problemas de una ciudad atrasada y desorganizada como la corrupcion, la inseguridad, el desorden.

Luego de leer todo esto, tu que no te identificas con ningun partido politico como la gran mayoria de peruanos, preguntate, por que no ha habido un solo presidente que de verdad haya querido mejorar al pais? alguien que si quiere robar que lo haga, pero que no le haga mas danio por lo menos al pais. alguien que en vez de ayuar un poco aunque sea no lo atrase aun mas.

Gracias a esto los peruanos, una vez mas (la anterior fue contra Toledo) perdimos la gran oportunidad de unificarnos como un pueblo y pacificamente llegar a un estado en el que la democracia funcione. Pero al paso que vamos esto no parece que llegara pronto. Tal vez en 30 o 40 anios los campesinos seran por fin tomados en cuenta como parte de la poblacion.

Si algo me ha interesado y he segudi desde que tengo memoria ha sido este proceso de la guerra subversiva. Humildemente puedo decir que se algo del tema y que puedo opinar sobre este. Por lo menos hay una sola verdade que me atrevo a afirmar:
-Belaunde fue ineficaz.
-Alan Garcia fue uno de los peores presidentes de la historia y fue totalmente corrupto ademas de ser participe de genocidios y actos en contra de los derechos humanos y que luego de que sus juicios preecribieran regreso al pais. Jamas afronto algun juicio que le debia al Peru.
-Alberto Fujimori utilizo una politica de guerra frontal y de aniquilacion estrategica. La policia actuo por propia iniciativa.

Nunca se utilizo una politica en la cual se tratara de enseniar al campesinado y de hacerlo participe del estado. Nunca hubo una tendencia por integrarlo a este. Y por ultimo las carreteras, los hospitales, los colegios y la condicion de vida estan muy por debajo del nivel adecuado.

Es cierto que el terrorismo mato a la malloria de esos campesinos muertos pero tambien las FFAA mataron un gran numero en vez de protegerlos. Las FFAA no cumplieron con su deber. mientras Sendero Luminoso y el MRTA proponian una revolucion de izquierda en la cual hubiera justicia e igualdad en el pais en conjunto. Por eso mi opinion seria que se aprovecharan esos 70 000 muertos entre ellos terroristas, FFAA y campesinos para que se unifique al pueblo peruano. Por eso es un acto culturalel hecho de que planifique el museo de la memoria.

Ojala queden esperanzas para este pais tan castigado por sus propios inquilinos. Creo que nunca llegamos a ser totalmente Independientes. Al fin y al cabo todos los gobiernos han sido nuestros propios opresores. Los verdaderos rateros en el congreso y los mas mentirosos en los partidos politicos.

La tristeza, la rabia y la verguenza de mi pais me han invadido y destruido totalmente. Estoy decepcionado y triste, sin embargo manana despertare con mas ganas de hacer algo por mejorar la calidad de vida de mis hermanos.

Sunday, 1 March 2009

ooooo men - parte 1

frio, calor, luz, agua por favor. donde estoy? ah si aca. que dia es hoy? bueno no importa eso mucho por el momento, "cuanto he dormido?" importa mas. entonces, desde cuando duermo? se que aun sigo cansado, antes de buscar agua, quisiera saber que hice...

(extrania lo antanio, chupar cania con agua de canio. Ahora es un ermitanio con la sociedad no tiene trato, con la soledad tiene un contrato de no olvidar cuando se fue de su jato....)

viernes, jugo de naranja. Sol, luz, manana. buenos dias y luego a la combi. pastelear a todos los ilusos companieros de combi que tengo hoy. Hoy derrepente te encontre en esta combi. Iras a tu universidad "privada" yo a mi universidad "publica". sin embargo eso poco nos importa aunque en verdad, a muchos si. Si esa fue una de esas pasteleadas, llegue bajo caminar hasta la entrada aunque veo a traves de las paredes. un pall mall rojo de 10 porfavor. 1.50 por 10 placeres. No tengo mis documentos universitarios. Como esta, me llamo Antropologo y soy marco. hola, como estas? si yo se, nadie lo propone aun, aunque todos quieran. bueno amigos del rincon del vago, amigos del c3, amigos companieros antropologos y sociologos, amigos cientificos sociales de baja calidad, companieros alkolikos en si: salud salud. vinitos de 3 lukas, el rico thunder cat y tal vez un ron Cartavio para temrinar. yo no quiero ir a Los Portales, Sky y harta chelita tranquis chupando hasta la ebriedad maxima. se hace tarde, es una de las mejores horas, cuando esta anocheciendo. alkol, mas alkol, 2 mas xfavor. musica para amenizar porfavor. oh si olvide las buenas tardes. bueno ahora de paso buenas noches. sigamos. aunque ya es un poco tarde. nos vemos en la casa de teddy. hola que tal? que haces? nos vemos. soledad pasajera, corto e inmenso tiempo en este transporte peligroso. gracias por existir ipod. Buenas noches, que tal? como estas? unas chelitas supongo. teddy, una chela mas y personas poco pero viejo conocidas. no? Buenas noches.

Algo tarde, ciertamente mas de 24 desconectado de la gran red. claro me comprare una barena luego ire a la base para hacer algo hoy. combi de mierda, ojala sea la ultima vez que te utilize hoy. conchesumadre, 1.20. ya toma. salud. hola perro, hola a todos. Buenas dias y a la soledad de mi cuarto, tu ven conmigo. barenita te utilizare sabiamente. tucutin. que hubo parsero? (ya estoy para este momento, ebrio no de alcohol sino de tanta adaptacion de cerebro) kiubo jiepuuuuuta. ya men listo taratita. esperare vere algo de tele, vere futbol,vere al arsenal, vere futbol vere al cristal. 5 de la tarde a baniarse y ponerse bacan. abrire el cajon. hay dinero felizmente. salgamos, y seran 8 soles menos para el alkol si me voy en taxi. vamos x luka. si las ke se van por guardia civil. Ahora si sera la ultima vez que te tome combi de mierda, lo juro!. Hola, buenas tardes por las que no las di y Buenas noches para ponerme al level. gracias x existir ipod. una barena xfavor. 5, 10, que chucha hora peruana. abla men que tal? abla men, salud. abla, no me digas que hoy estas misio? abla kiubo ijueputa?, abla malparido, abla triki. tamos completos creo. Aun asi es temprano, vinitos van vinitos vienen en vivanda, mejor un carti. buenas noches carti, como esta hoy? ya estas borracho? si! hora de irnos a drama. tomare un taxi xfin. la verdad si fueramos en combi ya no me importaria. verdad, cuantos cigarros me voy fumando? entrada 20 lukas, 30 lukas, 40 lukas, 100 lukas. feeeeee. adonde? directamente a la barra a sacar alkol y luego directamente afuera donde siempre vamos. ahora? a beber pues weon, ke kieres bailar? muy temprano mejor de borrachos. telikas van tekilas vienen. o men, si combinamos fuerzas podremos lograr todos nuestros suenios. yo el colombiano, yo el misio, yo la raza, yo el mentiroso, yo soy gay, yo arrugo, yo chonpi, yo el brazo, yo soy fumon, yo arrocitos, yo ANTROPOLOALKOLIKO !!!!
estoy seguro que como siempre terminamos bien borrachos, con un grupo de flacas igual de borrachas y xsupuesto aprovechandonos de esa situacion. ahi lo ves x un lado con esa tipa metiendole el mismo floro ke le mete a todas. ahi lo ves rodeado de todas sus amigas. ahi lo ves fumando con ese otro weon. ahi los ves par de pavos sentados con un par de barenas. ahi lo ves, bailando solo. ahi lo ves gileando colombianamente, ahi lo ves borracho hasta las huevas.
todos pasamos una gran velada, todos nos divertimos mucho, incluso llego un amigo de sorpresa. nuestro mejor amigo Leao.
Gracias cartavio x tanta bendicion. hora de ver la pelicula de los simpson o family guy. ultima barena, una bajadasa y ke tal, me llamo marco, buenas noches.

ahora si, todo el tubo de mi garganta pide agua. buenos dias (literales), aguaaaaaa !! desayuno de campeones xq esta jugando arsenal. todo bueno, ha ganado. tarde, esta oscureciendo y tengo un seudonimo y un codigo en mi brazo. estoy seguro que una de esas ninias lindas que me esperaron ayer al finals del carti. en fin, no la llamare, quiero que piense en mi que quiera que la llame que me desee llamandola. (obviamente eso no piensa). Vamos peru, a jugar como nunca y perder como siempre. ire x un par de barenitas para pasar mi domingo viendo futbol. buenas tardes. que rico comer chifa de almuerzo. provecho. futbol, futbol y mas futbol. buenas noches y a ver los programas de los domingos. programas politicos, el francotirador, fox (capitulo estreno de los simpson y la pelicula despues), el reino del surikato, y los canales de pelicula. buenas noches a todos. buenas noches soledad. sorry no tengo celular para hablar contigo pero siempre estamos juntos mi soledad. no te preocupes hoy dormiremos juntos, nos abrazaremos, estaremos solos, nos pensaremos, nos soniaremos, nos besaremos, nos miraremos de noche a oscuras, nos despertaremos a besos, y nos abrazaremos. x esta noche tu y yo seremos uno y mas de uno.

antes de dormir, quiera recordar unas cosas. mi perro, mi hermana, mis padres, mis amigos, mis cigarros pal mall rojos, mi verdecita, mi universidad, mi musika, mi ropa, mis perfumes, mi pipa felarenia, mis botellas de agua al lado, mi reloj despertador de -tuuuuuuuuuun, son las 4 horas 26 minuto)- mi cartavio, mis barenas, mi cuarto, mi casa.... hoy dejare a todos ellos, y solo me quedare contigo soledad por unas horas, por miles de horas, por una eternidad, x una vida contigo, junto a ti.

Anyway, Todo tiene su final. Buens noches.



-marco

Wednesday, 25 February 2009

Shoulders, toes and knees, I'm 36 degrees.


It's been a long time. I find this situation pretty familiar. Green, beer, music and ... Anyway also many messages to say. First of all no more Virgin Lumps. (pulmones virgenes). Welcome back green.


The other day my friend told me that this blog was full of excuses and after thinking a little bit yeah they are things that i have to face during my life. they aren't just excuses they are decision, they are my reality and the reality I see since my perspective which always tries to be as objective as possible. So let's produce something.

Sometimes is so difficult to get used to a new context. From my point of view the most inteligent people are the ones who can adapt the most to new cultures and situations they can. The same for the ones who know lots of languages. But it doesnt matter how well you can adapt yourself, you will never forget your roots or were you belong from. For example I will never forget one of the best ways I have, as an anthropologist, to interact with people, The Alcohol or Carti. On the other hand, probably thanks to alcohol I've made the worst mistakes in my life. Actually they are not just good things and bad mistakes they are more than that, at the end its part of you with the equilibrium it deserves. In this way, Raffo will always be a lier, chicho will always be the drugs addict, sukas will always be sukas and peruvians will never be on time for anything.

And suddenly you realize how much you adapted to the new context. And then maybe you have a very bright look (so gay that phrase). and then they all look at you and you feel with the power to change people's life with just one decision. Come on, take it! dont be pussy!
you have to ASSUME (the graffitti in the picture says "assume" in spanish) with responsability your new power. Actually you dont have too many options. what are you gonna do? turn and go back or face it ?? basically, theres no way back, you will always have it until you face it. And the adventure goes on.
I know, I know, there is so much bad thing too. And that the equilibrium that makes the adventure so interesting. It definetly wont be the same if Lindasay Lohan uses cocaine and I dont like it because she has red hair and for me that enough... isn't it ? I'm not sure actually but as my friend told me, no pain no gain. And oh yeah its true, at least for me. it will make it more interesting. It's like Domino's pizza 2x1 on tuesdays. Sometimes you dont know when is gonna be that tuesday, which in my case was Friday. (Romantic isn't it?)
And then you go even more deeply to this game. If I can explain the game is like a chest one where you have just one queen and you can make move wherever you want.

Like the men, and as torrico used to say before somethings, "Life is one". i know im an addict and actually im proud of that. yes You are a drug, perhaps one of the most lethal ones. And now i know im 36 degrees !! Theres so much to live....


thanks for the support I have received these days. You never left me alone alcohol and thanks for you too. Cheers mates whever you are and remember, Carti takes its time, but will never forget you!


Hey and for the ones who are feeling the same as me or something like that this song:





-Suka